Leading from the Back of the Room

I've taken a few months off from blogging during which I fear I may have become complacent with my own techniques and absorbed in a sense of competence in my mediation efforts. Then today I read about a Business leader who spoke of "leading from the back of the room" and I was struck by the notion that I had risen to the position of leadership where I take a seat which is not rightfully my own. That is an important reminder that I thought I would share. Though mediators may think we know the best way to resolve a particular dispute, leading from the front of the room can be so dangerous. Because at the end of the day, if the parties haven't come to the terms on their own, by their own volition, it may feel forced even though successful. That result is what we expect from the Court. A judge or jury may superimpose their decisions upon the parties. But mediation is supposed to be different. A reminder to lead from the back of the room--instead of the podium where the Judge sits, was really a great message for me.

Lessons for Mediators from Corporate Leadership

I was always a bossy little girl. So it was with great interest that I read an interview in this morning's New York Times of Susan Doeherty, who leads the United States Sales, service and marketing of General Motors. Her natural demeanor was instructive for me as a mediator in these ways. First, she recognized that communication is essential. "It needs to be simple. It needs to be consistent. And even when you're tired of what the message is, you need to do it again and again, because everybody comes to the table with a different perspective and a different experience"..."On some very key things, people need to internalize it, and they need to own it." Second, she says, "The best way to counteract coming across as being bossy would be to ask others what they thought." Third, she sits in a different chair at each meeting, to keep her meetings "dynamic". If it's good enough for GM, it's good enough for me. These are, in fact, essential lessons for mediation. And by the way, does anyone remember a male CEO being criticized for being "bossy"?

ADR IN BLOOM PROVES SPECTACULAR

What a powerful surge of energy emanated from Washington, D.C. last week at the ABA Dispute Resolution Section's Conference. It seemed that everywhere I turned, I encountered iconic figures who have not only "made it" in the field of mediation, but guided it, shaped it, and drive it. Among those I was privileged to meet were: Ron Kelly, (as in the Northern Californian who drafted the California Evidence Code on Confidentiality), Jim Madison, Jay Folberg, Robert Creo, Erica Ariel Fox, Jim Melamed and Mel Rubin. Of course, I always relish the opportunity to be among our local heroes: Mickey Katz, Forrest (Woody) Mosten, Lee Jay Berman and June Lehrman. I was particularly gratified to present with Myer Sankary (what a great speaker and a great friend!) and Nancy Burrell. The setting was beautiful, but what transpired inside was really the impact of the week. At one point, I literally felt pulled or drawn into this field in a physical, basic way that felt so very comfortable, and yet energized. The conference was highlighted by plenary addresses by both Former Ambassador Dennis Ross and Former Senator Tom Daschle. Together, and independently, these men so validate and represent my political views and yearnings. Let's all hope that by the next visit to our nation's capital, the values presented by so many of our "former leaders" will be shouting through the hallowed halls of Congress and the White House!